Monday, May 11, 2009

Right Path

At the ripe old age of 34 I wrote a song called, "Sweet Life." It was an ode to my kids and my parents, and it was a look at time passing by:

"Sometimes I feel I'm getting old, that life was all 'back then,' Still I know I'm younger now then I ever will be again..."

This was a reminder to myself that as old as I sometimes feel, I am, in fact, younger then I ever will be in the future. This is a powerful and positive way to view aging. Unfortunatley, as the days on the calendar fall away, we grown-ups generally tend to feel less powerful and less positive about our time remaining. We lean more towards the philosphy in the lyrics of another well-known songwriter (though, admittedly not as famous as me), Roger Waters:

"And the sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older, Shorter of breath and one day closer to death..." (Pink Floyd, "Dark Side of the Moon" as if you didn't know!)

The ever-hammering tick, tick, tick, of time sometimes manifests inner doubts and questions. Do I have enough time? Will I accomplish my goals? Will I have enough money to retire? Will my dreams finally come true? Will I be able to afford to send my kids to college? Will I ever get my baby-blue, 2-door, convertible Mercedes? And, if you're a writer like me, "Will I find the perfect agent and get my book published before I'm 100?"

Time passing is both fascinating and mysterious. How we relate to time and to our lives in general changes as we age. When I was a kid, I thought forever was a long, beautiful, never-ending, lazy road. There was no anxiety over not having enough time; no limit to the dreams I could and would imagine. As an adult, I realize forever was my innocent child's interpretation of life, and that I'd better be in action if I want to see my dreams blossom fully and vibrantly.

What is it you still want to accomplish in life? Having a happy, healthy family? Being kind to all living things? Snuggling with your pets? (One of my favorite and most oft-reached goals!) Marrying (or staying married to) your best friend? Becoming a great cook? Learning a different language? Traveling to exotic places? Creating something timeless that is yours and yours alone? All of the above?

Chuck and I wrote a song called, "Beautiful Illusion." It's about being one with yourself; being truly at peace.

"The beautiful illusion is near, I hear the voices whisper in my ear, "You're on the right path, it's clear..."


Look at your life and tell yourself honestly - are you on the right path? Is it clear? Is it somewhat hazy? What action can you take to further your dreams or goals?

Take that action. Now.

33 comments:

Pen Pen said...

:) Most of the time I feel like a 17 year old in a 25 year old's body...I wonder if I'll feel that way at 80...
AND-
the past few days I've been missin ur bloggy awesomeness cuz I've been wrapped up in some difficult life stuff-BUT-feel better that I'm back from that pit now! :) wooosa!

Sage Ravenwood said...

Wonderful post!

You always hear people say someday, then someday has come and gone and sadly they realize there are no more somedays and it's too late.

There are two things I always try to keep in mind:

Live each day as if it's your last.

You're only as old as want to be. Meaning you're neve too old to follow your dreams.

(Hugs)Indigo

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Pen Pen, I have a feeling you're a lot like me, so my guess is yes - you'll feel much younger than you are no matter your age. I'm glad you're back on track. I've missed you!

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Indigo, I'm glad you liked the post. And, yes, live every day as if it's your last, and you are NEVER too old to follow your dreams.;-)

Unknown said...

Although this sounds negative, I always tell myself that nothing on this earth is promised so keeping that in mind, I no longer worry about licking the beaters and getting down to a size 5. I can strive to be healthy and happy before hitting the point of never being happy.

I would also love to see my children's book published way before I have grandkids but once again, that's what I want but I can't say whether that will happen or not. But, I can choose to be happy with my life instead of seeking out the things that are negative.

Great post. Oh, and snuggling with my dogs is an easy goal for me too.

Traci said...

I'll be 39 this weekend. *sigh* By the way, that's my mother's dream car. She got a Toyota Sequoia (sp) instead. She has to tote grandchildren around ya know! Priorities! LOL

Anonymous said...

You've written a thought provoker...or should I say, a feeling provoker. You know that publisher I met with last Friday? He caught me off guard by asking me why I wanted his company to publish my book, instead of holding out for a larger publisher etc. Without hesitation I told him I accepted his offer because I'm nearly 47 and time is important to make that transition to supporting us with the words.

Thanks Debbie, for being a soul sister. There is something of a peaceful mystic in you. :)

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

CCD, You are absolutely right that nothing is promised. We must determine our goals and uncover our dreams and take action to see those things to fruition. Getting your children's book published would be a great joy, and petting the "fur-children" is always a blessing.;-)

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Traci, 39? You're such a baby! Happy early birthday, girlfriend - make sure you do something special for yourself. And, btw, tell your mom she has got great taste!!

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Val, Wow - intense that clock-ticking. And, thank you from someplace deep in my soul for your "words"...

Vikki said...

I think everyone gets stuck in the "someday". That suddenly they're going to wake up one morning and their life will really start. We really need to be waking up one morning (preferably TOMORROW!) to realize that the gun went off eons ago and we'd better get crackin'! And forget age! I whine about it for fun, but honestly, I pay very little attention to how old I am. I feel young, I think young, and thanks to exceptional DNA, I think I look pretty darn young, so that's all I take into consideration.

(great post, by the way. I'm on a "what would you do if you knew you could not fail" kick lately, so I can totally relate to what you're saying.)

Beth said...

Lovely entry, Deb. I've noticed that as I've gotten older, time seems to move faster and faster. It's a strange phenomenon.

Sandra Leigh said...

Thanks for the reminder, Deb. btw, I can't read the marker on the seaside path. The scene looks like the Dorset coast. Is that where the photo was taken?

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Vivi, First of all, you do look amazing! Totally amazing. And secondly, the "what would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?" question is one to live your life from. May we all move forcefully in the direction of our dreams...

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Beth, Absolutely - it's the snowball effect - we pick up speed along the way. A year to you and I is 40x faster than a year is to a five-year old. We have to push those thoughts aside, or simply leave them be, and stay focused on what we say matters to us. That is the way we stay free, and - dare I say - young!

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Sandra, I'm not sure where this pic was taken. I found it on the internet and thought it was perfect for my post. Sorry...!

WendyCinNYC said...

I feel like I'm on the right path. The goal that flashes on and off in bright pink neon is, of course, getting published. Being a good mother and wife continue to be my priority, but I feel like that's chugging along okay right now.

I'd like to run 5 miles at a time without stopping. Right now I'm at 2.

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Wendy, You're running two miles straight? Are you kidding me? That's amazing!!! Is there any new news on the publishing front? Has the book gone to submission yet? Also, I'll be in NYC soon - let's try to get together.;-)

Angie Ledbetter said...

I hope I get to see my kids become good and happy adults who pursue their dreams with gusto, while being truly kind to others. Personal dreams include getting the book published. Other than that, I hope to enjoy every day for the gift it is.

Kelly Polark said...

I so think I'm much younger than I really am!
I am definitely on the right path. My main focus is always family, and I am working toward my personal goals (which obviously includes writing).

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Angie, "I hope I get to see my kids become good and happy adults who pursue their dreams with gusto, while being truly kind to others." What could be better than that? Um, nothing.

And here, here to your publishing dreams - may you see all your dreams come true.

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Kelly, Your picture shows you bursting with energy - young, vibrant, glowing energy. It literally shimmers from you. And, family and personal goals are what keep you balanced. Go Kelly!

Vegas Linda Lou said...

Fantastic post, Debbie! The only thing that bothers me about aging is that time is seriously running out. I'm more than halfway to 100--half my life is over! So much to do...

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Linda, Don't worry, you'll get everything done that you need to in this life. Just make sure you enjoy every bit of it along the way!

WendyCinNYC said...

Let's for sure get together. Email me with the details!

I'm not on submission yet, but meeting the agent tomorrow for coffee. So we shall see!

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Wendy, I'll definitely e-mail you. Good luck with the meeting tomorrow!!!

Michelle D. Argyle said...

This is a beautiful post, a good question, and a lovely message. Thank you for helping me remember priorities and direction!

I love the new look of your blog! Very nice. :)

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Michelle, I'm glad you like the post, and you deserve some of the credit for my streamlined "cleaner" look. Thanks!

Amy said...

I now feel like I'm on the right path. When I was a nurse and doing things I thought others thought I "should" be doing, it didn't feel right and I knew I wasn't on the right path. And even though I'm strugglin' through with my writing, this is the right path. I'm a happier wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend. It's all good1 :o)

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Amy, Good for you! It sounds like you are definitely on the right path. It's so easy to fall into the trap of doing what others think you "should," or doing what's "easy." However, the reality is when you're not following your heart and soul, life is never easy.

Fragrant Liar said...

Yes, I catch myself thinking, I'm to old for that, or I'm running out of time. Hell, I'm only 53! Crazy.

I am on the right path, I think, though.

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

FL, Our concept of "time" is a trip. You're young and healthy and all things are possible. You "think" you're on the right path? Why the hesitation?

Lilly said...

Great post. I have been fixated on age lately given I have been camped at the hopsital. Its a reminder to me though that life is very short and we need to squeeze everything out of it that we can. Thanks for the reminder Debra.

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