SUBLIMINAL MONDAY: Stevie Nicks is Stalking Me (Again)

Stevie Nicks visited me in my dream last night. Again. It's kind of annoying, actually. I've considered contacting the authorities to report a stalker, but fear they'd take her word over mine. [Good call.]

I've had numerous dreams involving Stevie over the past few years. [Few? You call more than 30 "few?"] We're usually singing together and, I humbly confess, my vocal prowess is way better than hers. [Oh, look! A pink elephant is flying across the room! Whee!]

Which brings me to my point. [Seriously? It's that time of the decade?] What dreams do we have percolating within us that, no matter how we ignore them, just won't die? I've got a couple of big ones. [What does chest size have to do with anything?]

1) Rock Princess
As some of you know, this was my biggest dream. I took voice lessons, wrote songs, practiced guitar until I had calluses, and helped form a kick-ass rock band. [Must you use profanity? Oh, wait, yes. You're talking about rock and roll for f*ck's sake.] We performed, recorded, had our music played on the radio, won songwriting awards, and became one of the best original rock bands in Denver. But, over time, I stopped pursuing my greatest passion.

An acoustic guitar sits by my bed taunting me; willing me to joyfully create. [You do realize guitars are inanimate objects, right?] Sometimes I strum the steel strings, but more often, I don't. I still love singing and writing songs, but there's a sadness around it for me. I gave up on the 'big dream,' and hate that I gave up. [Don't be a hater. It's bad karma.]

2) Famous Painter
This may come as a surprise, since I haven't picked up a paintbrush since I was four, but I've daydreamed about painting beautiful masterpieces (think a cross between Monet and DaVinci) for most of my life. [Oh, look! Now a PURPLE elephant is playing with the pink one. How cute!] Alas, this dream dies a quick, painless death each time I choose not to do anything about it.

Then there are the dreams that refuse to die.

My writing is at the top of this list. Since I write full-time, one could say I've already achieved this dream. [BWAHAHAHA! Oh, wait. That wasn't a joke?] My muse, Lenora Esmeralda Cecelia Isabella Alexandria, or Lecia for short, [Your therapist has an opening in an hour. You should snag it.] dances freely through my mind, and with the exception of her waking me up in the middle of the night to write, "You simply must not forget dees, dahlink!" (her words, not mine), I love her with all my writerly heart. [You really are a fruit loop.]

Another dream I have is to turn my new town home (moving in mid-May) into a dwelling deserving of being featured in Architectural Digest. I love interior decorating and long to create unforgettable designs. [And I long to marry George Clooney and live on my own private island, but only one of us is smart enough to realize THAT AIN'T EVER GONNA HAPPEN!] Even if AD never comes calling, the pure joy of creating a living space that reflects my passions, personality, and artistic sensibility will be a gloriously manifested dream. [Oy, just oy.]

What about you? Do you have dreams that won't die? Dreams that pluck at your heart strings like a love-struck harpist? Do you have passions you've left in the dust only to be swept away like a tumbleweed in a whipping, western wind storm?

[Okay, that's it. I've got to stop you right here. You call yourself a writer? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT LAST PARAGRAPH ABOUT? This literary rubbish is humiliating to you, your parents, family, friends, strangers within a thousand miles, and most importantly, me, your [beloved, precious, beguiling] subconscious. Cut it out or I'll beat Lecia to death with an imaginary wet noodle, and leave you with nothing more than your worthless drivel and worn-out cliches. Don't cross me. I'm warning you! You need to stop this nonsense now. RIGHT NOW!]

I'm not sure why I feel the sudden need to end this post, but I do. So, please, friends, share your dreams. I'd love to hear them all.

Are Your Readers "On the Bus?"

Short blog post, folks.

As I mentioned on SUBLIMINAL MONDAY, I've changed the POV in my novel from 3rd person to 1st. I'm 13k words in, and the change is amazing. I have Kim Franklin and Becca Fitzpatrick to thank for this change, Kim for allowing me to be a part of (and winning!) her contest give-away of the novel, "hush, hush" and Becca for writing it (thank you both!).

As I read Becca's book, I had one of those major "aha!" moments. I suppose this is part of the reason why we writers are told to always keep reading. "hush, hush" is written in 1st person POV, and my book is similar to it on several levels. I realized that by my main character telling the story rather than an anonymous 3rd person, the novel had the potential to burst forth in a more powerful and exciting way.

I (of course!) love my book, but felt it was slightly sticky and forced. This POV change has opened up a new door and allowed fresh, beautiful air to breathe new life into the characters and story. This change allows the reader, as my dear friend Julie says, to be "on the bus." By that, she means the reader is fully involved in the story, experiencing it deeply, and has a stake in the characters, their journey, and their destination.

What do you - as a writer - do to make sure fresh air is blowing through your ms and that your readers are "on the bus?" I'd love to hear your thoughts.

SUBLIMINAL MONDAY - Edits, Don't You Love 'Em? [Um, no.] or I WANT MY SKINNY JEANS!

Since my first edition of SUBLIMINAL MONDAY was wildly successful [compared to my "modeling career"], I thought I'd make a tradition of it. This week's post is about EDITS! I don't know about you, but I love them [they make me want to throw myself from a bridge.]

Last night I received the edits for the 2nd draft of my novel from my agent. I was thrilled since she barely made any suggestions. [The manuscript (mss) looks like a triple homicide was committed on it. Red splattered everywhere. Shocking. Horrible. Terrifying.] My agent is brilliant [no really, she is], but apparently hates me and thinks I have no talent. [She hates me and thinks I have no talent.]

Actually, all those red marks are a good thing, right? [No.] I mean, it shows she cares about me and my writing and wants me to grow as an artist. [She's banging her head on the wall wondering why she signed me.] So, now I've got work to do, which is great, because I love reworking my novel over and over again. [Yeah, right, and I love cleaning bathrooms, too.]

I've got to buckle down and get cracking. [I have no idea what that means.] Since I'll be alone most of the day in a hotel room all week looking out my 31st floor window at the beautiful Inner Harbor of Baltimore, my plan is as follows:

1) Carefully read every page and give all comments my utmost attention. [Stare out the window as the boats sail by. Take pictures. Tweet them. Read new issue of US Weekly.]

2) Make changes as requested. [Nap.]

3) Read the editorial letter with keen interest. [Editorial letter? What editorial letter? Oh, you mean the attachment sent along with the mss? Dang, how did I miss that? BWAHAHAH!]

4) Call my agent and tell her what a genius she is for "fixing" my ms. [Call her and tell her she's a genius and thank the agenting gods for like the millionth time for sending her to me.]

One more thing: In the email Awesome Agent sent along with the bloodied mss, she said the following:  

"Think of this like boot camp. It really sucks to wake up at 5a.m. and go to the gym, but in six weeks when you need a skinnier pair of skinny jeans, you feel pretty damn good about it."

[I told you she was brilliant. Mean, but brilliant. And, yeah. I'm thinking "coral."]

Be sure to check back next Monday when I report on all the hard work I've done to whip my manuscript into shape. I promise, you won't want to miss that post! [I also promised my mom I'd wait until I got married to.... Oh, never mind.]

SUBLIMINAL MONDAY - FIRST EDITION! On Writing a New Book [Important Stuff]

I've decided to make SUBLIMINAL MONDAY a regular part of my repertoire. [Cue wild cheering.] Just so you now, said "subliminal messages" will appear within said brackets [ ]. I love saying "said" - it sounds so proper/elegant/formal [stupid], so if you prefer not to read these messages or feel they are "of the devil" [freak!], please feel free to skip over these [important] messages. (Did you catch the "message" in the picture above?)

I have no one but myself to blame [LiteraryJules] for this brilliant idea. [What the hell have I got myself into?] I don't have any "regular" features on my blog because I like to be spontaneous - it keep things fresh and interesting [allows for frequent naps]. In lo [that's the first time I've used "lo" in a sentence] my many years of blogging [15 months], I've never felt compelled to have structure. I mean, why bother? It's like so totally constricting, dude! [Like, OMG, I hate rules!] But, 2010 is MY year [humor me, I'm a first-born], so I figured, why the hell not? [Great point!]

For the first installment of SUBLIMINAL MONDAY, I've decided to discuss my shiny new work in progress. It's a "companion piece" to THE SECRET KEEPER, which means it's not a sequel, but a related story with some of the same characters. I know this term because I'm a savvy writer. [Julie Nelson told me. It was news to me.]

Writing my new book is a [crap shoot] process. Here are the three main steps I take to insure mega-awesomeness when writing:

First of all, I am completely organized, creative, and available for surprises. I always [never] have a detailed outline which I follow to a tee. [You can't follow something that doesn't exist.]

Secondly, I meditate for at least ten minutes before each writing session. [If you believe that, I've got some swamp land in Jersey we should discuss...] This allows my muse to stop whatever she's doing [playing polo in the English countryside with Prince Henry, perhaps?] and locate me. I find that meditation is good for the soul as well as the writing portion of the brain ["writing portion of the brain" BWAHAHAHA!], so I always take time and nurture my meditation skill. [It takes no skill to meditate. You close your eyes and try not to fall asleep. Any Joe Six Pack can do it.]

Lastly, I sit down at my computer - I call her Jezebel - [yeah, she's as hot /creepy as Bette Davis] and start writing. This is the wonderful piece of the artistic process where I let my mind wander freely to create exciting, beautiful, magical worlds with fascinating, never-before-imagined characters [there's no such thing as an original thought]. As the words flow seamlessly [like pulling a 300-lb guerrilla around by it's teeth] my noble dream of novel-writing begins to take shape. If you've never tried it, you should. It's a holy experience. [Particularly if you're a masochistic sociopath.]

I hope you've found this first edition of SUBLIMINAL MONDAY helpful. I know I've enjoyed writing it. [I got up early for this? What? You mean 10:30AM isn't early?] I hope you'll spread the word and visit "Write on Target" every Monday for the rest of your  natural life. That's not too much to ask, is it? [I like to keep my goals realistic. In 2010, I plan on being crowned Miss America and piling (at least) 100 million dollars in the bank.]

Happy New Year to all! Thanks for making 2009 special. I can't wait to see what we all accomplish in 2010!

[No, seriously, I mean it. Thanks so much. You guys ROOOCCCKKK!!!!!! ;-)]